


Enderman bite go brrrrrrr

by Theceilingfan213



Series: Borealtwt Fics [14]
Category: Minecraft (Video Game)
Genre: DreamXD is mentioned, Enderman Hybrid Ranboo (Video Blogging RPF), Enderman Ranboo (Video Blogging RPF), Gen, I wrote this in class whoops, Ranboo-centric (Video Blogging RPF)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-11
Updated: 2021-03-11
Packaged: 2021-03-18 15:26:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,087
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29984910
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Theceilingfan213/pseuds/Theceilingfan213
Summary: Techno, Philza, and Ranboo decide to test Ranboo's bite force
Relationships: Ranboo & Technoblade & Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF)
Series: Borealtwt Fics [14]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2105919
Comments: 14
Kudos: 489





	Enderman bite go brrrrrrr

**Author's Note:**

> Just one of my random 3am prompts writes that I wrote during class  
> I clearly had no clue what to name this
> 
> Not proofread

A known fact is that an endermans jaws can unhinge itself. Their mouths opened wide, revealing sharp, almost unnoticeable, black teeth that lead into the void. Their jaws were strong, strong enough to decapitate a player with a simple crunch if given the chance. It hadn’t been too long since the Antarctic duo found out that Ranboo’s jaw also unhinged. The hybrid usually took to wearing a mask but eventually, with the coaxing of the other members of the commune, he wore it less and less until it was rare to see him wearing it. Techno was curious about the bite strength endermen had but refrained from asked until several months later, making sure the enderman was 100% comfortable with his appearance. 

They were eating dinner, potatoes to be exact. Ranboo had just unhinged his jaw, plopping 3 potatoes in before closing it, when Techno decided it was time to ask the question. 

“Hey Ranboo” the enderman gave a _vrrrop_ in response. “Do you know what things you can bite through?” Philza shot him a glare, clearly ready to scold him before Ranboo interrupted. 

“Actually, I’ve been wondering that too” Ranboo said, surprising Techno and Phil. “I haven’t really had the time to test it out though but the thought has definitely crossed my mind.”

“How about we spend some time tomorrow testing it out?” Techno suggested. Ranboo eagerly nodded, ending the conversation by shoving more potatoes into an unhinged mouth. Techno was already thinking about what blocks he wanted to test out, knowing that he’d probably have to go searching for some. 

It was bright and early the next day when Ranboo came over. The sun glared off of the snow harshly so Ranboo had to adorn his shaded glasses, one green lens and one red lens to keep on brand, to avoid burning his eyes in the sun. Techno and Phil were already waiting outside, a chest full of blocks and items they wanted to try next to them. They shared some greetings before getting straight to business. 

“Okay, so it’s already known that endermen can bite through bone but I just want to make sure you can before doing anything else” Phil explained, handing Ranboo a bone. Ranboo already knew he had the same bite force as a full endermen, having already been through several skirmishes with other endermen in the area. He bit the bone, breaking through it as though it was nothing. 

Techno let out a low whistle. “That will never not be weird to watch you do” Ranboo chuckled and then proceeded to eat the rest of the bone just to see the reaction of the duo. Like most, they look mortified. Ranboo simply wiped his mouth and asked what block is next. 

They tried several blocks after that, planks, logs, stone, bricks, quarts nether rack, and coral, every block being as easily broken as the last. They eventually started handing him ores, he easily broke every ore he was handed and the duo was running out of ideas. Techno had a few items he didn’t expect to have to try but now seemed like a good time. He hesitantly passed Ranboo a netherite shovel, made specifically to bite. Ranboo looked at the shovel and grabbed it. 

“Are you sure?” Ranboo already knew he could bite through netherite, he’d done it before, and he wanted to make sure that Techno was okay with it. Of course, the material could be reused but it took more work. 

“Yeah, kid, I made that shovel specifically for this” Techno gestured for Ranboo to do it.

And Ranboo did. The snap of the netherite echoed across the quiet tundra. Techno let out a ‘heh?’ before reaching into the chest and pulling out a block of pure netherite. Again, the block broke as though it were made out of butter instead of one of the toughest materials known to man. Philza’s eyes widened, wings ruffling a little as he turned to Techno in shock. Techno eye’s also widened and he went back to digging through the almost empty chest. Ranboo smirked slightly, amused by the duo’s reactions. Though he didn’t know just how strong his bite force was, he had heard the rumors of endermen being able to bite through virtually anything and expected himself to be able to do the same. 

Finally, Techno pulled his hand out of the chest, a shining netherite shovel in hand. Unbreaking III read the handle. The shovel was shoved into his hand and for once, Ranboo hesitated to bite. He actually wasn’t sure if he would be able to break it. He brought the shovel up to his mouth and bit. Just like the last one, the shovel snapped easily. 

“What the heck…” He heard Philza whisper. 

Ranboo stared at the broken shovel in his hand, surprised. He quietly handed the broken shovel to Techno. “Do you have anything else?” Ranboo asked, expecting no to be the answer. 

“Actually, I do” Techno pulled out a block of obsidian and handed it to Ranboo. 

Silence. The block breaks. Ranboo expected it, endermen could eat obsidian.

“That’s insane” Philza breaks the silence. Ranboo drops the crumbled obsidian to the floor but ate the rest in his mouth. Today was the day saw the most expression he’s ever seen from Techno in the past few hours than his entire life. Techno places down an enderchest and pulls out something. Bedrock. A gift from DreamXD. The unbreakable, unobtainable block. 

Ranboo took the block. Bedrock had a different feel than other blocks, it was rough and cold and emanated something ancient. And he brought it up to his mouth and bit. Nothing happened. He rearranged his bite on the block and tried again, harder this time. His teeth scraped against the block in an unpleasant way. He pulled the block away from his mouth, the antarctic duo both holding their breath. 

“Can’t break it?” Techno asked, sounding hopeful that maybe they had finally found a block that not even the enderman could break. Ranboo handed Techno the block back and then spit something into his hand. A small piece of bedrock. He hadn’t been able to break the block but he chipped it. He chipped the unbreakable block. 

“Oh my gosh” Philza sputtered out, doubling over with laughter as Tehno examined the block he was handed back, trying to find where it had chipped. 

“Remind me never to get on your bad side…” Techno said as he found the chipped location. Ranboo just laughed.

**Author's Note:**

> Aye this sucks but whatever have it anyways
> 
> Also, I haven't given up on my Catboo fic, I've just been playing too much Minecraft that I haven't been doing anything else whoops
> 
> Kudos are appreciated!
> 
> As always, stay safe, stay hydrated, bind safely, Thanks for reading!  
> -R


End file.
